Wednesday, August 02, 2006

don't blame the heat, blame the fact that you don't shut ur big yapper

well, here's some more antics from the hill... bc I dont know, its funny cause this stuff is happening just down the street... Senators are 'mad as hell and their not gonna take it anymore' bc their private elevator is being used by non-senators-- so this is what the NEW YORK TIMES writes about once the senate takes it summer break or whatever they call it 'Recess.' I don't have much to say about the issue because of the jokes i would have made are in the article. Damn actual reporting using humor as a technical device.

I will say one thing-- all the pictures in the article have a whole bunch of people crowding into the 'senator's only' elevator-- ON THE SECOND FLOOR-- maybe those people who are too old too remember how to decent "these blocks of diminishing height called stairs" and incidently are the same people who are at one of the most integral positions of the government, maybe they SHOULD.... ummm... i forgot how i was going to phrase it-- But my point was gonna be that we need YOUNGER SENATORS!

You know why there are not many EX-SENATORs? Thats bc most of them just DIE either during or after... thats not a real fact, but please, feel free to purport it as such to your peers. and yes, I am hoping that purport means what i think it does.

AND now for the second time In Shanshu history, a segment called:

"Now Why Didnt I Think Of THat Heist First?!! F**K!!!"

you'll recall that last year's was the lego-bandit. But this year's candidate is....

Thin Mints thief? Girl Scout leader charged

or the another headline: Girl Scout leader caught with hand in cookie jar?

Now i didn't bother to really read the article, but all I saw was $5,000 somewhere in there. Hell, I drop 20 bucks to get 6 boxes of thin mints once every year. and then its like Brigadoom, my thin mint girls disappear for the next 12 months.

you know how many boxes you can buy with 5 grand!! damn. wish I had thought of that. well, i could always raid the girl scout's cookie stand next time I see them.

me: um, Hi there!
girl scout: hi mister! would u like to buy some cookies?
me: F*K yeah! how many thin mint boxes do you have?
girl scout: well, how many do you want?
me: listen.... i..i just wanna see how many thin mint boxes you have...
girl scout: uhh, I dont think we're allowed to do that.
me: alright kid, listen... I'm 22 years old, I want all your thin mints, and I'm gonna take all your thin mints! and if anybody asks, your just gonna say that you ate them! so just be cool!
girl scout: MOM!!
me: ah crap! ah crap! well played little one! waaa! (throws boxes into the air and runs off into the distance)

alright, kindof a weak post this time- but it takes a man to admit that, right? RIGHT?!

oh, and a quick message to the city of DC and surrounding areas: IF UR GONNA WARN THE PEOPLE ABOUT BROWN-OUTs because of the excessive heat, BE MAN ENOUGH TO CALL EM full on BLACK OUTS that WILL SCREW ur DAY over! Quit hinding before your aphorisms DC! be a man!!

thats all.


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